Archive for January, 2012

They need to make it illegal to remove the kitchen scissors from the kitchen.

I just murdered a mosquito that was flying around my room. Lousy La Niña.

People really need to stop complaining about that roundabout in Hamilton.

I fought in the cola wars.

I don’t understand moisturizer for normal skin. If your skin is already normal, what do you need a moisturizer for? Do you want damp skin?

Man, wish that I lived in Greece and had yogurt parties with my sexy friends.

I smell of satsumas, mangoes and hemp. Thanks, The Body Shop!

I’m a little perturbed that my gift set came *with* a tin and not *in* a tin. I wanted a giant tin, consarnit. #firstworldproblems